Lindie's story of rape
Story to Tell

Lindsie’s Story – A Survivor of Rape (Sexual Abuse)

 

This is a story of how I was raped as a teenager

My best friend Diane always goes to their family store every day with her mum. The store is not too far from where I live so I visited her just like I did every other day.

Each time I visited Diane’s family store, I always help out in packing, arranging, cleaning the store, and sometimes selling goods.

One unfortunate day, I visited Diane in the store but this time her elder brother Paul who I have never met before was in the store.

According to Diane, Paul barely comes to the store. He rather stays home after school to play games with his friends.

They had just received new goods and the work in the store was too much for a person to do, so Paul came to help out in the store that day.

Since I was already there, I helped out as well as I have always done. I was 16years old who never had anything to do with a guy nor knew anything about sex.

I always said, “It could never happen to me.” But it did. And to this day, I live with the regrets that I thought nothing like that could ever happen to me.

I was taking the new goods to the basement while Diane was attending to customers in the Store. Paul also assisted in bringing the goods to the basement. We started talking from there and getting to know each other. We talked about education, career, favorite sports, and a little of politics.

I never thought Paul had a different intention in mind. The only thought I had in mind was that “Paul will be a good elder brother to Diane because he is exposed to what is happening in the world and Diane is lucky to have him as her elder brother”

Later that day around 12:30 pm, when we finished taking all the goods to the basement. Paul had sent Diane to get snacks for every one of us to take while resting.

Diane quickly left for the supermarket close by to get the snack.
I was just there in the store sitting on a stool and minding my business.

Then Paul went down to the basement and came back after 2 minutes, called me to come to the basement to see what has happened. I quickly jumped up thinking some of the goods have fallen or I have done something wrong.

That was how I went into the basement to see what Paul was calling me to come and see, just for me to turn back and ask paul what happen he shut the door and lock it.
I asked Paul, why he had shut the door, he grabbed me by my arms and pinned me on the wall. I screamed for help but the basement is very big and it’s downstairs.

Nobody could hear me screaming.

Paul forcefully removed my pant and covered my mouth with his left hand. He pulled me down on the ground and raped me.
I begged Paul to stop hurting me but he didn’t listen to me, he continued what he was doing. I cried for help but no one heard me.
Paul had to take my virginity, my pride, my security – Now I feel so shy and insecure talking to people.
When Paul had finish what he was doing, he buckled up and left the basement.

I cried and cried, I didn’t know what to do. I had so many thoughts going through my mind. What if I tell someone and they don’t believe me? Was it my fault? I thought Diane was my friend, if she was, how could her brother do this to me? Not to mention the multiple feelings I had. Shame. Guilt. Anger. Fear. But most of all disbelief. How could this happen to me?

 

“Speaking…slowly freed me from the shame I’d felt. The more I struggled to speak, the less power the rape and its aftermath seemed to have over me” – Nancy Venable Raine

 

After some minutes, I gathered courage, wore my clothing, and went out of the basement. I came to the Store, saw Diane and Paul. Diane had noticed something bad had happened to me. She quickly took me outside the store and asked me what happened, I told her everything that her brother did for me.

 

She was filled with disappointment and regret, then she offered to take me home.
On my way home, she kept on apologizing to me for what her brother did to me and told me to do anything my heart tells me, that she would support me.

When I got home, I ran to my room because I didn’t dare to face my parents especially my mum.

What would I say to her? How do I narrate the story?
I was in great fear. A lot of thought came into my mind like suicide “what if I just end it”?

Later at night, Mum had call me to come to help her in the kitchen then I accepted. I was helping out in the kitchen and suddenly I didn’t know when I busted out and started crying. Mum was shocked and began asking what the problem was, I couldn’t say anything. I was shattered, crying continuously. Then I calmed down and began to tell my mum what had happened in Diane’s store.

My mum was shocked in disbelief, she never thought something like this could happen to her daughter. She began to scream in tears, then my dad rushed out of his room and asked what the matter was.

She told him everything, immediately my dad became very angry, went inside his room and dressed up. He quickly call the Police and left the house.

My dad didn’t return until late that night. I was awake, I couldn’t sleep and Mum too was also awake.
Dad went to the room and jam the door. Then I went to the door to eavesdrop on their conversation.
I heard my dad telling my mum that he had arrested Paul and he was going to sleep in the cell that night.

I never felt sorry for Paul because he deserved more than that.
After some days, Paul’s parents came to my house to begged my dad to release Paul that he was a child.

What kind of a child at the age of 18years, would forcefully pin a woman down and have sex with her without her agreeing?

To cut the story short, we went to court on this case for weeks, and out of pity and apologies, and compassion, my dad withdrew the case.

Paul was set free from prison and I never went to that store again or went close to any member of that family again (not even Diane).

Later that year, we relocated to another place very far from the old house. I never saw Diane nor her brother or her family members again after we moved to the new house.

Nevertheless, this rape incident is a memory that never leaves my heart. I think about it every time and wish I had never gone to that store in the first place.

But, what has happened has happened. What doesn’t kill me, only makes me stronger.
I have learned to trust no one and be watchful of who my friend truly is.

 

 


Always tell your story

Do not shy from your story

Do not carry the burden alone

Let it out

Let your Burden out

Your story means a lot to us

Your story is your pride

Your story brings healing

You are not alone

We care about your story

We are happy to share your story with you

We love you

We are ready to listen

We are ready to help

No judgment

No condemnation

 

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Life musings by Nigerian lifestyle and relationship blogger Nuella Igwe focusing on creative entrepreneur, life tips, career, relationship, travel, blogging tips, beauty and skincare.

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