HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS WHILE BEING AN INTROVERT
An introvert is often thought of as a quiet, reserved, and thoughtful individual. They don’t seek out special attention or social engagements, as these events can leave introverts feeling exhausted and drained.
It’s no doubt I’m an introverted person.
The thought of putting myself out there to find a new friend makes me want to dive (deeper beneath the covers for a night) in with movies. I don’t rely on being around other people to get my energy.
Note:
There was a time in my life when I had tons of friends – back when I was in high school where I was surrounded by a gaggle of fun and outrageous people. But over the last few years, I had watched as time and distance caused a number of those friendships to fade.
It wasn’t until I got to college that I realized the few friends I truly had left; It hit me one morning when I was watching a video on Instagram. There I sat trapped in my bedroom guarding against another harsh African weather while watching this wild group of friends running around sun-drenched Lagos. At first, I was nostalgic but a moment later, and with a pang of realization, it occurred to me that I could have that.
I have always had a hard time making friends. I have been an introvert my entire life and before college, I don’t consider myself to be a social person. To say that I like to be alone is a bit of an understatement. Yet, I like to believe that I’m a likable and fun person and I literally enjoy being around and inspired by other people, just in small doses.
Over the last few years, I’ve found that there are a few really good ways to make new friends while maintaining my introverted way. And these few ways have really helped me a lot and made me break out of my shell.
How To Make Friends While Being An Introvert
Here are a few guidelines I have set for myself, and anyone else who is in a similar friendless boat.
1. Make Use Of Social Media
Connect with friends online. Social media is an easy place for we introvert to connect with friends. You can tweet people on Twitter, join some inspirational groups on Facebook and share your own experience. Follow people and pages on Instagram, share exciting videos, comments on people’s photos, and as well chat with them.
2. Take Your Hobbies Out
I love to play basketball, which in itself is a gregarious activity. I link up with my teammates for the game. It’s not too much of a leap to take an activity that you already enjoy and do it in a more social setting.
3. Let The Right Ones In
You do not have to make many friends be an interesting extrovert. You can stack the friendship deal with at least a few friends. Don’t look desperate for friendship, you desire much more. Is there some small part of you that thinks you don’t desire to have meaningful friendships because you don’t think that you’re fun or interesting enough? You have to shift your mindset from all that and let those that love you come close.
Related topic: 10 SWEET WAYS TO SHOW YOUR FRIENDS YOU LOVE THEM
4. Meet Ups
Meet-Ups aren’t mostly about going on a date or attending parties. Meets Ups can be small and intimate and leave room for real friendship-making. You can as well attend a conference, where you’ll get to meet few people you knew online or face to face and you can sign yourself up with those few friends.
Over to you, dear friend
Can you relate to what I shared today? What do you find challenging about making friends and what has helped you connect? Please do share your thoughts in the comments below!
Nuella Igwe
Life musings by Nigerian lifestyle and relationship blogger Nuella Igwe focusing on creative entrepreneur, life tips, career, relationship, travel, blogging tips, beauty and skincare.
32 Comments
FabG
wow nice ???????????????????????????????????????? thanks for the tips
FabG
wow nice ???????????????????????????????????????? thanks for the tips
Nuella Igwe
Thanks dear
Anonymous
Wow thanks
Nuella Igwe
You Welcome
Martha Cosmas
Looking like popularity when u are not popular, that should be me, I am introverted , our first sighting you think I am not. I like small groups, I always shivering when it’s time for group presentation but I tend to get hold of it, I am extremely shy but I also cover it up all well by not being in a system that can unleash it out and I speak louder on social media
Friends!!!! Well I tend to pull the crowd with me because of my curves, I actually have those extroverted curves, but do they really stay?? I have lost some friends who think I was to boring for their liking, some wanted me to be really loud or react a different way, or to do stuffs and be normal
But the truth is it does hurt when people you like judge you with the things you haven’t done by calling you boring. Regardless of it all I never chase friendship, when u think it’s not it, I will let it go even if it hurt, life continues because I know who I am, I am a beautiful curvy introverted black girl with talent and if my friends can’t see that, we can’t be friends
Nuella Igwe
Of course. Thanks for sharing your thoughts sweetheart
Happiness Dike
I can relate to your story, seeing as myself is also short on friends. I do appreciate the tips and I intend to use them
Thanks boo boo
Nuella Igwe
You are welcome dear
Uba Juliet-Nora
Nice one dear..
Keep it up????????
Nuella Igwe
Thanks dear
Anonymous
I can definitely relate, Gracias!
Nuella Igwe
Bèin!
Oluebube
Girl, I can fully relate to everything you said here, most especially the part of connecting with teammates. I’m equally introverted but extroverted around close people. Just like you, college life has really helped in bringing me out of my shell. Coming out of that self-made cocoon that’s super comfortable for an introvert is usually not the easiest thing to do, but it’s mostly a good decision. I really love what you did here. Thumbs up..
Nuella Igwe
Thanks dear????
Nnagboro Finbar .c.
Thank you so much dear, it is a privilege to be here to lean and shear…. This is the situation I always find myself.. I’m introverted and some things I think less of my self… I hardly make friends intentionally because I am also a shy guy but when I turns out to be friends with someone, I find out that they are always comfortable and always seems to enjoy my company. But that have never changed or improved my ability to make friends.. Like the saying, first impression matters.. That is always the problem.. But how will they know me, how will I tell my story, how will they get my contract to see my status filled with the things I love doing, how will they know the fun part of me…. If I don’t say hello for the first time..
And this is why I feel that I can fully relate with this… High School, social media and my hobbies( basketball, digital painting & drawing and cooking), and having to share all this with people has really helped me to become extroverted in a way..
Once again I am happy to been here, because I have been in this recovery process alone for a long time and getting to have people to share it with I wish and hope that it will be faster..
NURLLA IGWE thanks for this platform…
Nuella Igwe
I’m glad you like it. Thank you
Okonkwo
Magnifico
Nuella Igwe
Thank you
Kelly
Love it. It’s too relatable.
Thank you for this
Nuella Igwe
You are welcome
Lotenna
Nice write up
Nuella Igwe
Thank you
Syed Brothers
Thank you sharing this great post
topomzblog
Truth, it’s still difficult to connect, don’t even snap pictures to allow people see me.
Nuella Igwe
Hey c’mn… It’s okay to feel inferior sometimes but you should take pictures and admire yourself, even if no one is. Take pictures for yourself and be happy!
topomzblog
Thanks
Nuella Igwe
You welcome!
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